


Rocking Around the Christmas Tree

by Ninja_Librarian



Series: Shidgemas 2018 [8]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: But no spoilers or any of the season 8 nonsense, Christmas Party, Day 7: Countdown/Party, Emphasis on the party, F/F, F/M, M/M, Post canon, Shidgemas 2018, drunken antics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-25 03:46:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17113862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninja_Librarian/pseuds/Ninja_Librarian
Summary: Shidgemas Day 7: Countdown/PartyNeither Shiro nor Pidge want to go to the annual Christmas party. Then they come up with a fun solution."Let's play bingo.""Shiro, I know the fact that your hair is white may be a little confusing, but you do know you’re not an eighty-year-old grandpa, right?”





	Rocking Around the Christmas Tree

“Ugh,” Pidge groaned, sprawled out on their bed in her pajamas, her hair damp as she glared at the dress on its hanger across the room. “Do we have to go?”

“Pretty much,” Shiro said as he stood in front of the mirror, doing his tie.

“I don’t wanna,” Pidge whined.

“All of our friends will be there, and your parents,” Shiro pointed out. “And our bosses. We have to put in an appearance for at least that reason.”

Pidge huffed, blowing her bangs out of her eyes. “Look, the Galaxy Garrison Christmas party is always the same. Even the drama is the same every year. Someone spikes Hunk’s eggnog and he gets so offended, someone gets way too drunk and insults a commanding officer, there’s always two people in the corner making out… And then there’s that stupid mistletoe headband of Lance’s that he always wears for some godforsaken reason. Then he acts surprised and butthurt when he gets food shoved in his face because of it.”

“Yeah, well, at least it’s tame, set-your-watch-by-it drama compared to everything else we do,” Shiro pointed out. Then he paused and turned around, “Pidge, I just had an idea!”

“Oh yeah?” Pidge said, sitting up.

“Yeah,” Shiro said, grinning. “Let’s play bingo!”

Pidge stared at him for a good long moment.

“Shiro,” She said slowly. “I know the fact that your hair is white may be a little confusing, but you do know you’re not an eighty-year-old grandpa, right?”

Shiro narrowed his eyes at her and stuck out his tongue. “Christmas party bingo. You just said that there’s the same drama every year, so what we do is create our own bingo sheets and watch the party. When something happens, we mark it off. First one to get bingo wins.”

Pidge frowned at him, still not following.

Shiro went over to the desk in the corner of their bedroom—perfect for late night ideas or for having something to do when battling insomnia and nightmares—and grabbed two pens and two pieces of paper. He used one set to create a five-by-five grid, putting an x in the middle of the grid as a free space. Then in the top right square wrote: “Someone wears bells.”

Pidge frowned, then she grinned. “Ooh, I see now.” Using the other pen and piece of paper, she copied Shiro’s grid and free space. Then, she added in a square: “Someone is trapped listening to endless stories about someone else’s kid and/or grandkid.”

“Nice,” Shiro said approvingly. “So, you’re in?”

Pidge nodded. “Most definitely.”

*****

The rest of the time they spent getting ready and going to the party, they added things to their bingo sheets.

“All the carrots are eaten from the veggie tray, leaving only broccoli and celery. There is no more dip.” Pidge said as she scribbled on her page.

“Someone tries to explain Santa to Allura, Romelle, Coran, Kolivan, Krolia and Acxa. Again.” Shiro added. “Keith and Lance end up under the mistletoe

“Keith and Lance both insist that they’re only kissing because of tradition.”

“Awkward mistletoe moment. In other words, not Keith and Lance looking for an excuse to make-out.”

“Someone mentions Festivus.”

“Someone mentions Festivus who isn’t Matt.”

“Ooh,” Pidge said, nodding. “That’s a good one, babe.”

“You thought that was good, here’s another: Allura tries to convince everyone her ‘homemade cookies’ are homemade.”

Pidge let out a laugh. “Perfect. I’m hoping for drunk tweeting or other drunk social media interaction.”

“Going to one up that with drunken caroling.”

“Drunken arm wrestling.”

“Yes, I want that…”

“You just want to beat everyone. And you won’t because Krolia will be there and she’s the only one to end your arm wrestling reign.”

“Don’t remind me.”

They both arrived with full bingo sheets and an eagerness to win.

They walked into the hall, looking for trouble and shenanigans. Oh, and their friends.

“Hey, guys!” Lance greeted. Sure enough, he was wearing the stupid headband with a piece of mistletoe dangling half a foot from his face.

Pidge smirked at Shiro and lifted her clipboard and pen, making a show of marking off a square.

“Uh, why do you two have clipboards?” Keith asked, frowning with confusion.

“Reasons,” Shiro said. “More important question, did you bring Kosmo this year?”

“Yeah?” Keith said. “He’s… Oh. Oh no. Rizavi, you didn’t.”

“Oh, but I did, and he loves it, and, more importantly,” Rizavi dropped to her knees beside Kosmo, scratching him under the chin and cooed, “He looks super cute!”

Kosmo’s tongue lolled out of his mouth slightly, turning his head towards Rizavi to give her a lick.

The bells on the reindeer antlers on his head jingled as he did so.

Shiro grinned at Pidge, and made a huge check on the square that read “Someone brings a festively dressed pet”.

“Game on,” He told her.

*****

“Allura, Romelle, lovely sweaters,” Shiro said as he and Pidge approached the two Altean ladies. “Allura, I must say, I’m a big fan of the bells.”

“Yes, so festive.” Pidge added, eyeing Romelle’s top. “So bright.”

“Oh, thank you!” Romelle said, quite pleased. “We enjoyed finding holiday garments to celebrate!”

“You two did a fantastic job,” Shiro said, grinning at them.

“Shiro, Pidge, what are the clipboards for?” Allura asked, brow furrowing.

“Oh. Things. Human things,” Pidge said, slowly backing away. “Oh, look, there’s my parents, better go say hi, enjoy the party!”

With that, the two dashed away, Shiro marking off his square that read ‘Someone wears bells’ and Pidge marking off ‘Someone has a sweater with flashing lights’.

“Humans are rather strange, are they not, Princess?” Romelle asked, her brow furrowed.

Allura sighed. “You’ll get used to it, Romelle…”

Halfway over to the Holts, Shiro stuck his arm out, stopping Pidge in her tracks.

“Holy quiznak,” He whispered. “Look!”

They gaped as Kolivan and Krolia made an appearance. Everyone’s eyes were on them.

Or, rather, the Santa hat on the Blade of Marmora leader’s head.

“This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” Pidge breathed. “I knew this one would be easy, but I just didn’t realize how glorious it would be.”

With that, she marked off: “Santa hat”.

The silence was only broken by the tinkle of glass breaking and the moment was—sadly, over—as everyone’s attention turned to Kosmo sniffing a broken ornament while Keith tried to get him to teleport away from the shards—and get the remaining ornaments away from Kosmo’s swinging tail—with a piece of turkey.

Shiro grinned and lifted his pen. “Broken ornament,” He said. “Thanks, Kosmo.”

*****

Shiro’s gaze was on the drinks table and his attention was not on Commander Iverson’s story at all.

He watched as Rizavi, not too subtly, crept over to the bowl of eggnog and poured a whole bottle of rum in it.

As her superior officer, he could have done something. Said something. Stopped her, even. He knew what she had been doing the moment the moment she left the room and came back in hiding something.

But he was competitive, and off duty, so instead, he merely lifted his clipboard and checked off: “Eggnog is spiked.”

*****

Pidge gritted her teeth as she watched Rizavi slink away. She knew spiking the eggnog was an easy entry, but it was only fair that Shiro got that one when she had Santa Hat.

However, she did have something on her sheet that could still get her even—if not one step ahead—with Shiro.

“Hunk,” She said to her friend, smiling at him brightly. “How about we go get some eggnog?”

“Oh, yeah!” Hunk said, his eyes bright. “I put it together, you know?”

“Did you?” Pidge said, feigning surprise. As if Hunk wasn’t responsible for putting together the eggnog every year.

They walked over, filled their cups and Pidge just sipped her drink, watching as Hunk took a sip of his.

She tried hard not to smile as a look of complete and utter rage fell onto Hunk’s face.

“Who,” He growled. “Spiked. My. Eggnog!?!?”

Pidge caught Shiro’s eye, or, rather, his narrowed glare from across the room. She only smirked and checked off a single square: “Hunk stews in anger because his perfect eggnog was spiked.”

*****

Now that the eggnog was spiked, it was only a matter of time for the rest of their bingo cards to be filled.

Until then, Pidge and Shiro bided their time.

Pidge made it a point to walk past the food table every few minutes, scrutinizing the vegetable tray. She drew some stares when she whooped and pointed at the leftover celery and broccoli, saying, “Oh yeah, no one likes you! Everyone loves those carrots and dip!”

Those who stared at her were even more confused when she lifted the clipboard a second later and made a mark with a self-satisfied expression.

Shiro smiled as he complimented Allura’s cookies, asking her where she bought them.

“Oh, Shiro, I’m flattered,” Allura tittered, looking slightly smug. “But I actually made them! All by myself!”

“Really?” Shiro exclaimed, pretending to be shocked. “Wow, I would never have guessed… They are so good, I thought they had to come from a special shop or something.”

“No, just my kitchen and my own two hands,” Allura said, looking pleased with herself.

Shiro was pleased to, for another check off his sheet.

Because he knew for a fact that her cookies always came from the grocery store.

Pidge made a sly comment to Matt, complementing the tree in the corner, only for Matt to heave a sigh and say, “Yes, but it is nothing compared to the Festivus pole back home.”

He didn’t even notice that she proceeded to make a mark on her sheet.

There was no prompting to get Coran to talk about the good-old days of Altea, and Altean holidays.

“When I was a young whippersnapper, I would always go with my grandfather to bring home the largest Snarguwuffle bush that could be found,” Coran said wistfully. “Then we’d spend the rest of our time looking for Jumjums and Beawicks to decorate.”

“Oh, what are those?” Shiro asked. “Flowers? Or…?”

Coran chuckled. “Oh, no, Jumjums were a little bit like your frogs here on earth. But in the winter months go into full hibernation. Come in bright, beautiful colors. Beawicks were little flying insects that give off a sweet aroma, and they also froze in hibernation. We just stuck ‘em on and waited for Snarguwuffle day and pray we didn’t do anything too early.”

“Because of traditions?”

“No, because the Jumjums and Beawicks would come out of hibernation once they warmed up. Cause quite a bit of mischief they do. Half the fun of Snarguwuffle day is getting those critters out of the house!” Coran chuckled. “Never forget the one year we lost one of them Jumjums in my Great-Aunt Lorena’s house. Didn’t find him until a month later, when she was in the bath. Oh, we were all so certain that her screams could have been heard all the way in the Spinolcle quadrant.”

Shiro was starting to think he should have found a way to mark off two spaces for Coran’s stories…

Pidge felt smugly satisfied for more than one reason when Lance got a cupcake smushed into his face because of his stupid mistletoe headband.

Meanwhile, Shiro enjoyed watching several awkward mistletoe moments, the most surprising result being Veronica and Acxa, who kissed then Veronica shyly asked Acxa if she wanted a drink and a dance. To his surprise, the half-Galra woman accepted with a shy smile.

About two hours into the party, most of the older officers were heading out for the night, having put in their time. Sam marked his and Colleen’s exit with a toast, which made Shiro grin and silently thank his girlfriend’s father for helping him mark off another square on his sheet.

But then, to both Pidge and Shiro’s delight, the combination of champagne, wine, spiked eggnog, and the departure of superior officers was starting to take effect on the younger set of party-goers.

As soon as top brass was gone, a quite tipsy Rizavi grabbed the microphone and turned up the music, declaring it time for karaoke, to the delight of many in the crowd who proceeded to—while under the influence of alcohol—make total fools of themselves singing an absurd mix of Christmas pop songs, Disney, and—courtesy of one very, very drunk officer—the Itsy Bitsy Spider.

Pidge only really paid attention to this drunken nonsense long enough to mark it off on her sheet, rushing around the room for other nonsense.

Specifically, the nonsense she was looking for was James Griffin. She knew full well that he did not hold his liquor well, and she was looking forward to using him to win.

Unfortunately, Shiro thought the same thing, and he gave her a smug look as he found a rather tipsy James digging his finger into Keith’s chest.

“—just go around thinking you’re better than the rules. Oh, look at me, I’m Keith and I think just because I’ve got mediocre flying talent I don’t have to follow the rules!”

“Just because it’s a rule doesn’t mean it is right! Dumb rules need to be broken!” Keith yelled back.

Keith was still pretty sober comparatively speaking, but that didn’t stop Keith from getting into fights. Because had you met the guy?

Shiro checked off “Someone drunk insults someone” on his sheet.

As he did so, Krolia had gotten involved in the situation, yelling at James: “HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY CUB? YOU WILL PAY WITH THE WRATH OF A THOUSAND SUNS! WE SHALL HAVE A FIGHT TO THE DEATH FOR THIS INSULT!”

“Krolia, Krolia, Krolia,” Pidge said, approaching the Galra woman, who had James by the shirt. “Now, it’s Christmas. It’s a time of mercy. Therefore, I suggest we amend that ‘fight to the death thing’. Not let go of the insult, mind you, but handle it in a different way.”

“And what do you suggest, Pidge?” Krolia asked, frowning at the young human.

Pidge smirked and ignored Shiro’s noise of dismay and outrage. “Have about a round of arm wrestling?”

And that was how the drunken arm wrestling competition began.

Better, the entire thing was being live-streamed courtesy of Rizavi…

On the Garrison’s official social media.

How Rizavi got her hands on the Garrison’s social media passwords, Pidge didn’t know and didn’t want to know.

All she knew was that videos of James’ crushing defeat at the hands of Krolia was broadcast on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and more, accompanied with Rizavi’s drunken misspellings and lack of grammar.

She then used said social media to vague-blog about and shade James as the likes and retweets came pouring in faster than the booze.

Which meant that Pidge got to check off both “Someone starts an arm wrestling competition” and “Drunken tweets.”

They never had to specify who started the arm wrestling competition, after all.

“Cheater,” Shiro whispered in her ear. Pidge stuck her tongue out in response.

“You’ll get your chance,” She said. She tilted her head past him. “Uh, looks like your chance has come.”

Shiro whirled around, and he grinned broadly as he saw Keith and Lance standing sheepishly under the mistletoe.

“I mean,” He heard Lance said. “We might as well.”

“Yeah,” Keith said, his cheeks dark. “Tradition. And stuff.”

As the two began to kiss with a little more passion than tradition usually called for, Shiro smugly checked off “Keith and Lance are caught under the mistletoe” as he said to Pidge, “I guess mistletoe is not a dumb rule to be broken.”

“Not by Keith’s standards,” Pidge said as she marked off “Keith and Lance pretend that they only had to kiss because of tradition.”

The party really started getting wild from there.

Acxa once again pleasantly surprised Shiro—and, more importantly, Shiro’s bingo sheet—by being the “Unexpected party animal”. Meanwhile, Lance and Veronica were trying to drown out the music with their own drunken caroling, though admittedly it was all in Spanish so Shiro had to rely on very limited knowledge of the language to check that one off.

Pidge, meanwhile, had never been more pleased to nearly trip over a passed-out-drunk body, as she crossed it off her sheet. She also had a few surprises, the biggest being finding Ina and Ryan on the floor in a mistletoe-free corner, passionately making out—and getting perilously close to second base.

“Hey,” Pidge said, nudging Ryan’s foot with her own. “You two wanna, I don’t know, get a room?”

This suggestion had nothing to do with her bingo sheet, but more rather with the fact that she was certain that these two also did not end up on Rizavi’s drunken social media tangent in compromising positions.

The two pilots paused, looked at her, then glanced at each other, then Ryan grinned and Ina nodded, returning his grin with a small smile. Ryan helped Ina to her feet.

“We’ll be back in a moment,” Ryan told Pidge, his arm around Ina’s waist as he started to lead her out.

“No, we won’t,” Ina corrected, smirking slightly at Pidge and winking. “Not if I have anything to say about it.”

Pidge chuckled as she watched the two leave.

Then, her eyes widened.

Wait.

She looked down at her clipboard, scanning, scanning.

There it was.

“Someone says they’ll be back in a moment. They never return.”

Her heart pounded as she lifted her pen.

She crossed the square.

She looked all across the row.

One x: Someone mentions Festivus.

Two x: All the carrots are eaten from the veggie tray, leaving only broccoli and celery. There is no more dip.

Three x: Drunken karoke.

Four x: Someone says they’ll be back in a moment; they never return.

Five x: Santa Hat.

“Bingo,” Pidge whispered. Then she raised her clipboard over her head and hollered, “BINGO!!!!!”

From across the room, Shiro’s head whipped towards her, a pout crossing his face for a moment, then he heaved a sigh and smiled faintly as he made his way over to her.

She showed him her page. “I won. Fair and square.”

“That you did,” Shiro conceded. “Congratulations. You won. So. What will you claim as your prize?”

“It’s a two part thing. The second part is to go home and get the quiznak out of these shoes and this dress.”

“And the first part?”

Pidge suddenly looked a bit shy. “I’d like a kiss. Under the mistletoe. And not Lance’s stupid headband.”

“Considering Veronica absconded with it and is making out with Acxa as we speak, I don’t think it’s considered Lance’s anymore.” Shiro said. He took Pidge by the hand and smiled, “And I will most definitely, always, kiss you under the mistletoe.”

Pidge smiled and they hurried across the room where mistletoe dangled.

Shiro bent down and Pidge rose on her toes to meet him, a practiced routine, almost second nature for them.

But it didn’t make this kiss any less magical than all the ones before it, nor would be dull in comparison to all the ones that would follow.

They broke apart, but not by much, only to catch their breath and smile.

“Merry Christmas, Katie.” Shiro whispered.

“Merry Christmas, Takashi,” Pidge whispered.

Pidge let out a squeal as Shiro suddenly swooped her in his arms bridal style. He kissed her firmly on the mouth again, then said, “Let’s go home.”

And so they did, leaving the chaos of the remains of the annual Galaxy Garrison Christmas party behind.

******

“Ugh,” Keith groaned as he crawled out from underneath a table. “What happened last night?”

“Party.” James answered from a few feet away, where he lay face down on his stomach, too hung over to move. “Christmas party.”

“We got way too much Christmas cheer this year,” Veronica added from where she sat against the wall, Acxa’s head in her lap.

“Shhh…” Acxa said, her eyes squeezed shut. “Not so loud…”

“Why do we keep doing this to ourselves year after year?” Romelle asked, wrapped up in a festive plastic tablecloth. “You’d think we’d learn…”

“Uh oh,” Rizavi said, grimacing as she looked at her phone. “Is it bad that top brass wants to see me ASAP?”

“What are these for?” Lance asked, picking up the two clipboards.

“Oh, those were Pidge and Shiro’s,” Allura answered, using a mirrored tray to try and get her hair in a somewhat respectable state, but quickly gave up. “They were carrying them around all night. Said it was for ‘human things’. Honestly, I was too afraid to ask for more specifics.”

Lance frowned at the two bingo sheets. “Honestly? Looking at these? So am I.”

Everyone was way too hung over to be curious, and decided to let it go.

After all, what happened at the Christmas party, stayed at the Christmas party.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and Merry Shidgemas to all!


End file.
